Haz Quotes

I don't suppoze thare haz ever lived a man without a single virtew. Even Judas Iskariot "went and hanged himself." (Josh Billings)
A man's reputashun iz something like hiz coat, thare iz certain kemikals that will take the stains and grease spots out ov it, but it alwus haz a second-handed kind ov a look, and generally smells strong ov the kemikals. View quote
Josh Billings
If thare iz enny human being that i thoroughly loath, it iz the one who haz nothing tew boast ov but hiz money--a mere pimp tew hiz welth. View quote
Josh Billings
The wealth ov a person should be estimated, not bi the amount he haz, but bi the use he makes ov it. View quote
Josh Billings
There iz no more real satisfackshun, in laying up in yure buzzum an injury than thare iz in stuffing a dead hornet, who haz stung you, and keeping him tew look at. View quote
Josh Billings
Love haz a most vorashus appetight, but a poor digestion, what it feeds on most alwus distresses it. Prudes, are coquets, gone to seed. It iz our duty tew pray for them who revile and persekute us, but i dont kno az we are obliged tew let them kno it. View quote
Josh Billings
7 per cent haz no rest, nor no religion, it works nights, and Sundays, and even wet days. View quote
Josh Billings
Too mutch religion iz wuss than none at all. Yu kant sho me a kuntry that haz existed yet, whare the people, all ov them, professed one religion and persekuted all other kinds, but what the religion ruined the country. View quote
Josh Billings
About one haff the pitty in this world iz not the result ov sorrow, but satisfackshun that it aint our hoss that haz had hiz leg broke. View quote
Josh Billings