Dishwasher Quotes - page 2

I got fired when I was a dishwasher at Denny's. That set me back a little bit. You don't realize how important dishwashers are until you do the job. (Kelsey Grammer)
Several years ago my dear wife went to the hospital. She left a note behind for the children: "Dear children, do not let Daddy touch the microwave"-followed by a comma, "or the stove, or the dishwasher, or the dryer." View quote
Thomas S. Monson
Several years ago my dear wife went to the hospital. She left a note behind for the children: "Dear children, do not let Daddy touch the microwave" - followed by a comma, "or the stove, or the dishwasher, or the dryer." I'm embarrassed to add any more to that list. View quote
Thomas S. Monson
The Electric Monk was a labour-saving device, like a dishwasher or a video recorder... Electric Monks believed things for you, thus saving you what was becoming an increasingly onerous task, that of believing all the things the world expected you to believe. View quote
Douglas Adams
I have never really cooked, don't know how to use my dishwasher, and subsist mainly on prepared deli takeout. I don't even eat in restaurants much. View quote
Jerry Saltz
Look at me closely, amigo,” said my dad. "Here is a hundred-dollar bill just to start with. Thirty dollars of this is for you to put in your own pocket right now. Capiche?” The bartender's whole attitude changed. Suddenly he wasn't tired anymore. "Yes, mi general, entiendo!” he said. "Good, and give another twenty to the chef in back and ten to the dishwasher. That leaves forty for my son and me to drink and eat a little something.” "But of course!” said the barkeeper. "The whole place is open for you! Which tequila would you like?” he added anxiously. "Herradura, and a couple of Modelo cervezas.” "I like Dos Equis,” I said. "The dark one.” "Okay,” said my dad, "one Modelo and one dark Dos Equis.” The bartender was flying, moving, truly enjoying the whole show. My dad winked at me. "Like I always say, to tip after the meal is stupid. Tip first and big, and the whole world changes. View quote
Victor Villaseñor