Warning: Undefined array key "visitor_referer_type" in /var/www/vhosts/wordinf.com/core/app/libraries/Core.php on line 98
Joke Quotes - page 29 - Quotesdtb.com

Joke Quotes - page 29

Back in the late 1950s, on the sleeve of the Beyond the Fringe record album, Jonathan Miller made a dark joke about his worst fear: being tortured for information that he did not possess. The assumption behind the joke was that if he had something to reveal, the agony would stop. He was looking back to a world of polite British fiction, not to a world of brute European fact. In the Nazi and Soviet cellars and camps, people were regularly tortured for information they did not possess: i.e. they were tortured just for the hell of it. (Clive James)
I always enjoy conversation more if there is some substance to it - which is a just incredibly hilarious thing for me to say because for many, many years I was the guy whose only contribution to any conversation was, 'There was a funny 'Simpson's' joke about that.' View quote
Joss Whedon
An audience who watches my shows knows who I am, knows that right when they think I'm going to make a joke, I'm going to blow something up, or during the worst peril, I'm going to have someone give someone a kiss - it's just going to happen. View quote
Joss Whedon
You might like it as a joke or because you liked it then, but there isn't a whole new generation discovering Wham!. View quote
Rob Zombie
I sometimes joke, Paula, even paranoid people have enemies. View quote
Rahm Emanuel
The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved to have sex. Men need to have sex to feel loved. How do we ever get started. View quote
Billy Connolly
I never told a joke in my life. View quote
Andy Kaufman
I'm pretty equal opportunity when it comes to issues to joke about. View quote
Elayne Boosler
When you tell an Iowan a joke, you can see a kind of race going on between his brain and his expression. View quote
Bill Bryson
A joke is by definition politically incorrect - it assumes a butt, and a certain superiority in the teller. The culture won't put up with that for much longer. View quote
Martin Amis
First of all, Saddam did not win the war, even though he says he did, I mean, you know, that's a joke and everybody in the world knows it. (Norman Schwarzkopf, Jr.)
Bob: To God, homosexuality is no joke! View quote
Jack T. Chick
A. S. O.. S. I NEED YOUR HELP. I AM INJURED, NEAR DEATH, AND TOO WEAK TO HIKE OUT OF HERE. I AM ALL ALONE, THIS IS NO JOKE [double underline]. IN THE NAME OF GOD, PLEASE REMAIN TO SAVE ME. I AM OUT COLLECTING BERRIES CLOSE BY AND SHALL RETURN THIS EVENING. THANK YOU, CHRIS McCANDLESS. AUGUST ? View quote
Christopher McCandless
Science fiction has its own history, its own legacy of what's been done, what's been superseded, what's so much part of the furniture it's practically part of the fabric now, what's become no more than a joke... and so on. It's just plain foolish, as well as comically arrogant, to ignore all this, to fail to do the most basic research. View quote
Iain Banks
If I were to say every one of you is an Avatar, a few would be tickled, and many would consider it a blasphemy or a joke. The fact that God being One, Indivisible and equally in us all, we can be nought else but one, is too much for the duality-conscious mind to accept. View quote
Meher Baba
"Ylma is having you work it out in the most gruesome way possible... so that when she teaches you how it's really done, it'll seem that much easier.... Like hitting yourself in the head with a hammer-it feels so good when you stop." This was the oldest joke in the world, but Barb hadn't heard it before, and he became so amused that he got physically excited and had to run back and forth across the kitchen several times to flame off energy. A few weeks ago, I would have been alarmed by this and would have tried to calm him down, but now I was used to it, and knew that if I approached him physically things would get much worse. View quote
Neal Stephenson
So many guys are so conservative with their hair, and I always joke with all my buddies when they mess with me, and I'll say, 'That's right, keep the same haircut for ten years.' How fun is that? View quote
Tom Brady
I'm still no good at ball-and-stick games. If I go play golf with the guys, it's intended to be a joke. View quote
Neil Peart
I've heard every pie joke in the book. I'm still waiting for an original one. View quote
Jason Biggs
Theres no amount of money that makes you feel better when people think of you as a joke or a hack or a failure or ugly or stupid or morally empty. View quote
Patrick Stump
It ain't no joke when you lose your vinyl. (Afrika Bambaataa)
The idea that any performer type is owed anything is a joke to me. View quote
Henry Rollins
I come from a town of great musicians: Washington, D.C. It's no joke, that history. View quote
Henry Rollins
As the old joke goes, I have all the sins together. I am a woman, a Socialist, separated and agnostic. View quote
Michelle Bachelet
There is a kind of laughter people laugh at public events, as if a joke were a charity auction and they want to be seen to be bidding. View quote
William McIlvanney