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My friend has a baby. I'm writing down all the noises the baby makes so later I can ask him what he meant.
Steven Wright
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Don't ask permission. If it does not work, you can apologize later.
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I mean, they say you die twice. One time when you stop breathing and a second time, a bit later on, when somebody says your name for the last time.
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Wealth I ask not, hope nor love, Nor a friend to know me; All I ask, the heaven above And the road below me.
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Potential," I said, "doesn't mean a thing. You've got to do it. Almost every baby in a crib has more potential than I have.
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I gave up writing blurbs because you make one friend and 200 enemies.
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