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I learned how to fire a sniper rifle, which I'm sure will be useful at some point.
Paul Giamatti
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I have been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
Mark Twain
Wedding: the point at which a man stops toasting a woman and begins roasting her.
Helen Rowland
Reflect upon your present blessings of which every man has many - not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.
Charles Dickens
His faith, perhaps, in some nice tenets might Be wrong; his life, I'm sure, was in the right.
Abraham Cowley
Some one is generally sure to be the sufferer by a joke.
William Hazlitt