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The three ages of man: youth, middle age and 'my word you do look well'.
June Whitfield
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Young man, the secret of my success is that at an early age I discovered that I was not God.
Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
Erma Bombeck
A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.
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Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.
Ogden Nash
In youth we learn; in age we understand.
Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach