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I had a girlfriend before I ever had a boyfriend, but it was just a phase.
Mark Gatiss
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Poor Nations are hungry, and rich Nations are proud, and Pride and Hunger will ever be at Variance.
Jonathan Swift
My girlfriend always laughs during sex - no matter what she's reading.
Steve Jobs
If man does find the solution for world peace it will be the most revolutionary reversal of his record we have ever known.
George C. Marshall
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know because I've done it a thousand times.
Mark Twain