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If you're going to tell people the truth, you better make them laugh; otherwise they'll kill you.
George Bernard Shaw
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Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.
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An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh.
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Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.
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If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
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My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.
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