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The day may never come when it is seen as funny.
Roger Ebert
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My way of joking is to tell the truth. It's the funniest joke in the world.
George Bernard Shaw
True love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen.
François de La Rochefoucauld
Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
Mark Twain
The two most important days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why.
Mark Twain
It is folly to abstain all day long from food, but fail to abstain from sin and selfishness.
John Chrysostom