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Women laugh when they can, and weepe when they will.
George Herbert
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An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh.
Will Rogers
All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.
Oscar Wilde
Plain women know more about men than beautiful women do.
Katharine Hepburn
I've only slept with men I've been married to. How many women can make that claim?
Elizabeth Taylor
If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.
Woody Allen