Laurie Notaro quotes

I majored in journalism at Arizona State University, where I began writing the columns I write now, but I cannot, in good conscience, refer to myself as a writer. I'm a columnist, maybe a journalist, I guess I'm an author, but writer... no. That's not up to me to call myself, that's rather lofty. It's for the reader to decide. (Laurie Notaro)
If you really believe in what you're doing, work hard, take nothing personally and if something blocks one route, find another. Never give up. View quote
Laurie Notaro
I'm nicer on tax day than I am when I'm on deadline. View quote
Laurie Notaro
I've never really considered doing stand up, but I have done readings/spoken word things fairly often in which I'll just tell a bunch of stories and run off at the mouth. I'm a big tangent person. View quote
Laurie Notaro
I want a man as nice as my retarded dog, but one that doesn't crap on the floor. View quote
Laurie Notaro
Small towns are sometimes like that; familiarity runs high, while regard for personal space is low, if nonexistent. View quote
Laurie Notaro
Books are to me as homemade tattoos are to an inmate. Can't get enough of them. View quote
Laurie Notaro
I've had to write a column an hour after I've come back from a funeral. A deadline is a deadline, I mean, that was just what my job was. View quote
Laurie Notaro
... Everyone knows there's only one thing less welcome on a stage than a mime, and that's a clown, because everyone knows that clowns eat people. View quote
Laurie Notaro