Johnny Vegas quotes

I trained to be a priest - started to. I went to seminary school when I was 11. I wanted to be a priest, but when they told me I could never have sex, not even on my birthday, I changed my mind. (Johnny Vegas)
I hate flying, airports and the whole rigmarole - queuing up, security and lost luggage. View quote
Johnny Vegas
It's lovely being a parent and being in a strong marriage with somebody who is your best friend. View quote
Johnny Vegas
It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I love the way my weight fluctuates in the newspapers. It was 18 stone and then people look at a bad picture of me and add a few more stone on. I think the highest was 22 stone. View quote
Johnny Vegas
Being 'Johnny' was almost like an out of body experience. I thought he was just a character that I'd created and could quite easily step away from, but it was much more difficult than that. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I believe that Britain is becoming more class-conscious, and I quake at the very idea of Old Etonians ruling the world again. View quote
Johnny Vegas
If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I'd probably spend a lot of money on it. View quote
Johnny Vegas
Up North you are holding your own. Everyone considers themselves a comedian. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I think it sort of dawns on you that if you're not gigging constantly you're not actually relevant. You may be relevant to a different part of the media now, to television commissioners and editors, but to a young live-comedy audience you're not, really. View quote
Johnny Vegas
The idea of being on TV 24 hours a day and people seeing the real me... No. (Johnny Vegas)
I actually enjoy being heckled; it keeps it interesting, and I think it is a nice feeling for people once they have left the show. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I used to attract a lot of feeders. I'd be quite happy to be locked in someone's flat and fed liquidised burgers. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I get obsessed with decorations and decorating the house. I keep it tasteful outside, but when you get inside it is a bit like Blackpool illuminations, I go bonkers! View quote
Johnny Vegas
It can be tough as a jobbing actor. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I had a massive amount of self-belief when I did stand-up. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I use very few muscles at the best of times. View quote
Johnny Vegas
You can sway an audience if you win the women over. The gentlemen will follow 'cause they can be so foolish like that at times, they are easily led. View quote
Johnny Vegas
With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I was loved as a kid; I was raised with more love and emotional support than most folks could wish for my memories aged nought to ten are all bound up together in a mesh of innocence and fun. View quote
Johnny Vegas
You always hear people saying, 'I hope I'm not turning into my dad', but I'd be honoured if I became half as decent a bloke as he is. (Johnny Vegas)
The cheese board is my big treat at Christmas that I have to deny myself during the rest of year. View quote
Johnny Vegas
There is something more spiritual to us than what we are on this earth, but how you access it I'm not sure. View quote
Johnny Vegas
There have been times I've finished a big job and thought, 'Great, a couple of weeks off.' But then a couple of weeks turns to three weeks and then after a month you're staring at the phone willing it to ring. View quote
Johnny Vegas
I still give myself the right to be highly critical of others, though. View quote
Johnny Vegas