Greg Behrendt quotes - page 3

There's a guy out there who will want to tell everyone that he is your boyfriend. Quit goofing around and go find him. (Greg Behrendt)
First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend. View quote
Greg Behrendt
A good indication that it's not is if you're only staying with What's His Name because you're scared. View quote
Greg Behrendt
Don't spend your time on and give your heart to any guy who makes you wonder about anything related to his feelings for you. View quote
Greg Behrendt
Busy' is another word for 'asshole'. 'Asshole' is another word for the guy you're dating. View quote
Greg Behrendt
Life is hard enough as it is without choosing someone difficult to share it with. View quote
Greg Behrendt
If a guy truly likes you, but for personal reasons he needs to take things slow, he will let you know that immediately. He won't keep you guessing, because he'll want to make sure you don't get frustrated and go away. View quote
Greg Behrendt
Being brokenhearted is like having broken ribs. On the outside it looks like nothing's wrong, but every breath hurts. View quote
Greg Behrendt
We (men) would rather lose an arm out a city bus window than tell you simply, "You're not the one.” We are quite sure you will kill us or yourself or both-or even worse, cry and yell at us. View quote
Greg Behrendt
Don't waste the pretty. View quote
Greg Behrendt
I've never tried to pass myself off as anything more than a comedian who wrote a dating book. (Greg Behrendt)
I don't know if you know you're funny, but you enjoy being funny. I know I'm funny because people tell me I am, but when I watch myself, it doesn't make me laugh. Does that make sense? Because I know the jokes, and to me, I feel like I'm pulling the wool over people's eyes. And there are probably people who do not enjoy what I do. View quote
Greg Behrendt