Janet Evanovich quotes - page 4

With the exception of dessert, food is food. (Janet Evanovich)
He specializes in virgins! The brush of his fingertips turns virgins into slobbering mush." Mary Lou Molnar. View quote
Janet Evanovich
God's a busy guy. He don't have time to micromanage. What are the chances he heard that? It's early in the morning. He's probably having breakfast with Mrs. God. View quote
Janet Evanovich
When something needs to be ironed I put it in the ironing basket. If a year goes by and the item is still in the basket I throw the item away. This is a good system since eventually I end up only with clothes that don't need ironing. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I almost never shoot people. View quote
Janet Evanovich
You never want to look in a mirror," Lula said. "Men love mirrors. They look at themselves doing the deed and they see Rex the Wonder Horse. Women look at themselves and think they need to renew their membership at the gym. View quote
Janet Evanovich
My body is not designed to run. My body was designed to sit in an expensive care and drive. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Aren't you something," Grandma said. "I never saw a midget up close." "Little person," Briggs said. "And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, either. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Excuse me?" I said, palms down on the Formica tabletop. "Coffee? I thought we came here for pie." "I don't eat the kind of pie they serve here." I felt a flash of heat go through my stomach. I knew firsthand the kind of pie Ranger liked. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I buy wine according to the bottle design. After I get down the first glass it all tastes okay to me so I figure you go for something classy to look at on the table. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I rolled my eyes so far into the top of my head I almost fell over backward. (Janet Evanovich)
[Stephanie Plum]Jeez. No True Love" [Grandma Mazur] There's always been true love, but in my day, you either talked yourself into thinking you had it, or you talked yourself into thinking you didn't need it. View quote
Janet Evanovich
As long as he has a house with two bathrooms. I swear to God, I don't care if he's Jack the Ripper. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Somewhere along the line, I realized that I liked telling stories, and I decided that I would try writing. Ten years later, I finally got a book published. It was hard. I had no skills. I knew nothing about the business of getting published. So I had to keep working at it. View quote
Janet Evanovich
You can get through very serious and sometimes horrible and sometimes embarrassing and very awkward situations with humor. It gives us a way out. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I go to bars and restaurants, and I sit and I eavesdrop on people and I watch people in shopping centers and, you know, I read the newspapers and I talk to the Trenton cops, and I just get a lot of information that comes in that somehow turns into a book. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I take in a lot of stuff from real life, movies, television, news and it all gets mixed in my head and somehow turns into a story idea. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I like being able to provide consistent and frequent literary choices for my fans. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I think that some books are more successful than others to certain readers. People who read my books for the humor, they're going to love one book. People who read my books for the mystery, they might not like that book quite as much. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I wasn't always a writer. When I went to college and majored in fine arts, I was a painter. Then I was a stay-at-home mom. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Ranger appeared in the bathroom doorway and I was too relieved to be embarrassed. "I appreciate you coming out in the middle of the night," I said. Ranger smiled. "I didn't want to miss seeing you chained up naked. (Janet Evanovich)
A woman's never too old to make an idiot of herself. It goes along with equality of the sexes and potty parity. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Happens to me all the time...People are always underestimating my dumbness. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Suppose something goes wrong? Suppose you need a big full-figure woman like me to help straighten things out?" Lula. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Here's a basic difference between Morelli and me. My first thought was always of cake. His first thought was always of sex. Don't get me wrong. I like sex . . . a lot. But it's never going to replace cake. View quote
Janet Evanovich