Janet Evanovich quotes - page 2

My professional aspirations were simple - I wanted to be an intergalactic princess. (Janet Evanovich)
I make lots of mistakes. I try hard not to make the same mistake more than three or four times. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Nice dress. Take it off. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I hate mornings. They start so early. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I'm telling you, it's fu**ing hard to be classy. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Either get out of bed or else take your clothes off," he said. "I'm not in the mood to compromise. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I attributed the incidence to temporary insanity, and in my own defense, I'd like to say I haven't run over anyone since. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I need to look like an idiot at least twice a day to keep myself humble. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Thinking very often resembles napping, but the intent is different. --Stephanie Plum. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Men drive off bridges and drink too much because of women like you. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Some men go a lifetime and never have their kid blow up a car, but I have a daughter who's knocked off three cars and burned down a funeral home. Maybe that's some kind of record. (Janet Evanovich)
I ran three miles, staggered into the lobby, and took the elevator back to my apartment. No point to overdoing this exercise junk. --Stephanie Plum. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Ranger locked eyes with me. "Please," he said. Tank and Hal were goggle-eyed. They weren't used to "please." I wasn't used to it either. But I liked it. Okay," I said. "Be careful. He's insane. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Its always nice to have a stud muffin at the table. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I looked over at him. "Is that a proposal?" There was total silence for a couple beats. "I'm not sure. It just popped out." "Let me know when you're sure." "Would you say yes?" Morelli asked. "I'm not sure. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I checked my phone messages. Three in all. The first was from Joe. "Hey, Cupcake.” That was it. That was the whole message. The second was from Ranger. "Yo.” Ranger made Joe look like a chatterbox. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Mooner was walking around laying his hands on the cars, divining karma. "this is it", he said, standing by a small khaki-colored jeep."this car has protective qualities" You mean like a guardian angel?" I mean, like, it has seatbelts. View quote
Janet Evanovich
When I was six years old I sprinkled sugar on my head, convinced myself it was pixie dust, wished myself invisible, and walked into the boys' bathroom at school. View quote
Janet Evanovich
I wasn't a fabulous cook. I didn't have a boyfriend, much less a husband. And I wasn't a big financial success. I could live with all those failings as long as I knew that once in a while I looked really hot. View quote
Janet Evanovich
You're going to find this hard to believe, but cops aren't required to carry emergency condoms." Joe Morelli. View quote
Janet Evanovich
There's me and then there's you, and you aren't ever going to be as good as me, Sweet Thing." Ranger. (Janet Evanovich)
My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn." "She used to watch the Weather Channel, but she said there wasn't enough action." -Ranger and Stephanie. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Okay, take a deep breath, I told myself. Don't go all hormonal. Get the facts straight. Have a mental doughnut. View quote
Janet Evanovich
You'd tell me if we were getting married, wouldn't you? I mean, you wouldn't just appear on my doorstep one day and say we were due at the church in an hour. View quote
Janet Evanovich
Omigod,' I said on a sudden flash of sleep-deprived insight. 'You're the big bad wolf.' There are some similarities. View quote
Janet Evanovich