Helen Fielding quotes

Can officially confirm that the way to a man's heart these days is not through beauty, food, sex, or alluringness of character, but merely the ability to seem not very interested in him. (Helen Fielding)
It is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going okay, another falls spectacularly to pieces. View quote
Helen Fielding
It is proved by surveys that happiness does not come from love, wealth, or power but the pursuit of attainable goals. View quote
Helen Fielding
Sink into morbid, cynical reflection on how much romantic heartbreak is to do with ego and miffed pride rather than actual loss. View quote
Helen Fielding
Valentine's Day purely commercial, cynical enterprise, anyway. Matter of supreme indifference to me. View quote
Helen Fielding
Don't say 'what,' say 'pardon,' darling, and do as your mother tells you. View quote
Helen Fielding
I'm no good at anything. Not men. Not social skills. Not work. Nothing. View quote
Helen Fielding
One must not live one's life through men but must be complete on oneself as a woman of substance. View quote
Helen Fielding
I like you very much. Just as you are. View quote
Helen Fielding
When someone loves you it's like having a blanket all round your heart... View quote
Helen Fielding
Tom has a theory that homosexuals and single women in their thirties have natural bonding: both being accustomed to disappointing their parents and being treated as freaks by society. (Helen Fielding)
Oh God, what's wrong with me? Why does nothing ever work out? View quote
Helen Fielding
I come from Yorkshire in England where we like to eat chip sandwiches - white bread, butter, tomato ketchup and big fat french fries cooked in beef dripping. View quote
Helen Fielding
In the end there is nothing more unattractive to men than radical feminism. View quote
Helen Fielding
It's rather fun writing a female spy, because she has so much more kit. Bond never carried a hair dryer or a makeup bag. And he certainly didn't wear an uplift bra. View quote
Helen Fielding
Dieting on New Year's Day isn't a good idea as you can't eat rationally but really need to be free to consume whatever is necessary, moment by moment, in order to ease your hangover. I think it would be much more sensible if resolutions began generally on January the second. View quote
Helen Fielding
.. we were always taught, instead of waiting to be swept off our feet, to 'expect little, forgive much'. View quote
Helen Fielding
I will not get upset over men, but instead be poised and cool ice-queen. View quote
Helen Fielding
But if you are single the last thing you want is your best friend forming a functional relationship with somebody else. View quote
Helen Fielding
I like L.A. It's like a mini break. For a writer, it's hilarious. Like the food. Where I come from, we eat chip sandwiches: white bread, butter, tomato catsup and big fat french fries. It's delicious. Here, you order a creme caramel and the waiter says, 'You know, that contains dairy.' View quote
Helen Fielding
Oh God. valentine's Day tomorrow. Why? Why? Why is (the) entire world geared to make people not involved in romance feel stupid when everyone knows romance does not work anyway. Look at (the) royal family. Look at Mum and Dad. (Helen Fielding)
I am a child of Cosmopolitan culture, have been traumatized by supermodels and too many quizzes and know that neither my personality nor my body is up to it if left to its own devices. I can't take the pressure. View quote
Helen Fielding
Eventually, I manage to cheer Mum up by allowing her to go through my wardrobe and criticize all my clothes... View quote
Helen Fielding
Comedy tends to come out of things which are quite painful and serious. View quote
Helen Fielding
My books have all generated controversy. View quote
Helen Fielding