Joe Rogan quotes

No girl wants a secretly gay boyfriend, every dude wants a secretly gay girlfriend. (Joe Rogan)
No matter how civilized we are and how much society has curbed violent behavior. Human beings still have the same genes they had 10,000 years ago. Our bodies are designed to have a certain amount of physical stress and violence in them. We're designed to run from jaguars and fight to defend our territory. View quote
Joe Rogan
If you can lie, you can act, and if you can lie to crazy girlfriends, you can act under pressure. View quote
Joe Rogan
When women go to see men strip, we never accuse you of hating men. View quote
Joe Rogan
When you snatch little pieces of other people's lives and try to palm them off as your own, that's more disgusting than anything. Robin Williams is a huge thief. Denis Leary is a huge thief. His whole stand-up career is based on Bill Hicks, a brilliant guy who died years ago. View quote
Joe Rogan
As a longtime practitioner of yoga and a person who's been involved in physical fitness my whole life, I can tell you, yoga helps you achieve altered states of consciousness. It is not just stretching. The only way you can say that it's stretching is if you haven't done it, or that you haven't done it rigorously for a long period of time. View quote
Joe Rogan
Phil Hartman was brilliant, and Dave Foley is a really funny guy. Phil Hartman was actually even funnier offstage than he was onstage because he would say nasty things. Dave Foley's very funny, very witty guy, very quick. View quote
Joe Rogan
People are scared man, they're scared of the void. View quote
Joe Rogan
I was raised Catholic. That's why I don't take religion too seriously. View quote
Joe Rogan
With the help of two concepts that are traditionally opposed-science and spirituality-we humbly reintroduce psychedelics back into the cultural dialogue. View quote
Joe Rogan
I don't care if you're gay, black, Chinese, straight. That means nothing to me. It's all an illusion. (Joe Rogan)
Never stay in a bad marriage, and don't hang around with psycho coke fiends. View quote
Joe Rogan
If you are the greatest, why would you go around talking about it? View quote
Joe Rogan
I talk so much about sex that girls just want to meet me. View quote
Joe Rogan
On my left knee I have a long scar from an ACL operation. I've had both knees reconstructed. View quote
Joe Rogan
The only time I commit to conspiracy theories is when something way retarded happens. Like Lee Harvey Oswald acting alone. View quote
Joe Rogan
The planet's spinning a thousand miles an hour around this gigantic nuclear explosion while these people roll these machines with rubber tires over this hard surface that we've laid down over the planet so that we can easily move ourselves back and forth. View quote
Joe Rogan
I had a great time on News Radio, I got to make tons of money in relative obscurity and learn a lot about the TV biz and work on my standup act constantly. It was a dream gig. View quote
Joe Rogan
Any comic like myself owes everything he has to Lenny Bruce. He was the originator. The godfather of uncensored American stand-up is clearly Lenny Bruce. View quote
Joe Rogan
I never in my wildest imagination dreamed that I would somehow become a sports commentator. View quote
Joe Rogan
When someone comes along and expresses him or herself as freely as they think, people flock to it. They enjoy it. (Joe Rogan)
The comics I hate are thieves. Nothing's more disgusting than a guy who steals another person's ideas and tries to claim them as his own. View quote
Joe Rogan
What's interesting about science is that we're constantly discovering new things about the universe, about ourselves, about our bodies, about diseases, about the possibilities of the future. It's amazing. Science is one of the coolest things about being a human being - without a doubt. View quote
Joe Rogan
Because I have a girlfriend, I try and take the straight and narrow path, which is good because it prevents VD. View quote
Joe Rogan
Reality really is theater. There's no other way to describe it. It's all so nonsensical, ridiculous and chaotic. View quote
Joe Rogan