Chris Pontius quotes

When he's asleep, I wish he was awake, when he is. (Chris Pontius)
Pedal faster! Come on, there are crocodiles in this water and I hear they'll eat anything - even plastic! View quote
Chris Pontius
You're not even Mexican! View quote
Chris Pontius
I guess I don't have any last words. I'm just gonna kill myself once I lose my wiener. View quote
Chris Pontius
Today's debate: Is it wrong to be strong? You be the judge. View quote
Chris Pontius
Hi, I'm bunny the life guard and if there's any life-saving to do I'm the man to do it. View quote
Chris Pontius
There's a very good chance we could be riding each other to Russia. View quote
Chris Pontius
I'm not into bestiality, but that's a good-looking animal. View quote
Chris Pontius
Fire doesn't burn if you're already dead!" View quote
Chris Pontius
They say Poland is the Mexico of Europe. I don't know what that means, but I like it. View quote
Chris Pontius
From my experiments with sexiness, seems like a lot of people are afraid at first, and fear usually equals violence. But eventually I'll win their hearts and instead of fighting they'll want to make love to me. (Chris Pontius)
I'm gonna be so bummed when they announce my sexually transmitted diseases. View quote
Chris Pontius
Sir, could I trouble you for a kiss? View quote
Chris Pontius
You look cool, Steve-0. View quote
Chris Pontius
That was intense. REALLY intense. Well, not really intense. But pretty intense. View quote
Chris Pontius
Some people just don't know how to party. View quote
Chris Pontius
Water-based lube: Friend or Foe? View quote
Chris Pontius
Latvia gangsters. cool. I want to join them. View quote
Chris Pontius
That guy right there is the best damn roller skater ever. Maybe even in the whole town. View quote
Chris Pontius
Russian police. Stern, stern but fair. View quote
Chris Pontius
For one thing, God didn't invent the circumcision, I did. (Chris Pontius)
With a simple shave of the razor Steve-O easily disguises himself in fooling the whale shark in thinking he's a harmless young boy. View quote
Chris Pontius
Hi I'm Bunny the Lifeguard and if any of these alligators try to ruin our swimming, I'm gonna wrestle 'em to the ground and probably have my way with them. View quote
Chris Pontius
Wait a minute. I already know my fortune, it's partying! View quote
Chris Pontius
I gotta come to term with my sexuality. I gotta know what I'm all about. View quote
Chris Pontius