Patton Oswalt quotes - page 2

I mean, the death in the late eighties and early nineties really shook out a lot of hacks. The pond just sort of dried up for a lot of really bad comedians. (Patton Oswalt)
I had a romance novel inside me, but I paid three sailors to beat it out if me with steel pipes. View quote
Patton Oswalt
Every audience is different, even within the same venue. You have to just make every audience your audience; you can't pre-judge an audience based on the size of the room or the type of room. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I think I realized it was an art form at the beginning, but it took me a really long time before I was able to view what I was performing myself as an art form. View quote
Patton Oswalt
Any acting job that I ever got, I always treated it like I was a neophyte; I didn't know what I was doing, and I was going to work just as hard as I do on my stand-up. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I like to write, I like to do stand-up, I like to act. View quote
Patton Oswalt
Beyond any role that I ever had, really early on as a stand-up, I would see actors decide to try it and they would bomb miserably. What I realized was that stand-up, acting and writing are all their own disciplines. View quote
Patton Oswalt
The Kentucky Fried Chicken corporation made a bobble head of me and sent it to my management. No card, nothing. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I'm always trying out new stuff onstage. That's where I do all my writing. View quote
Patton Oswalt
Yeah, there were a few years in the early nineties where I really began to hate what was valued as funny and just sort of what was valued in stand-up, period. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I grew up in such a featureless, personality-less suburb. There was nothing to push against. (Patton Oswalt)
I think right now is the best time for stand-up, ever. I sincerely do. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I'm not familiar with the metric system. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I have to drink this much to be as unfunny as you. View quote
Patton Oswalt
Everything we have today that's cool comes from someone wanting more of something they loved in the past. Action figures, videogames, superhero movies, iPods: All are continuations of a love that wanted more. View quote
Patton Oswalt
Having enough money has to go hand in hand with living in a way that you're not being a slave to your possessions. View quote
Patton Oswalt
If you play comedic scenes like they're really serious, then it's so much more funny than if you're going for a laugh. View quote
Patton Oswalt
It's like our country is being run by a bunch of bad alcoholic dads right now. View quote
Patton Oswalt
90% of every art form is garbage - dance and stand-up, painting and music. Focus on the 10% that's good, suck it up, and drive on. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I mean, all alternative comedy is are comedians that have being doing it for so long, for so long, that they were relaxed enough to start becoming personal on stage. View quote
Patton Oswalt
I hate all sidekicks. (Patton Oswalt)
I have some shorter stories coming out in other books early next year. I might be pitching a re-vamp of Ghost Rider in the spring. We'll see. View quote
Patton Oswalt
As unhealthy as I am, I'm weirdly aware of exactly how my body functions. View quote
Patton Oswalt
With acting, you see some of the kids are literally just off the street, untrained, and they are great. And others are off the street, untrained, and kind of horrible. View quote
Patton Oswalt
In my mind, I was always a comedian who was going to branch into writing. View quote
Patton Oswalt