John Oliver (comedian) quotes - page 2

People are always going to say stupid things, and you're always going to be able to make jokes about that, but it should be the last thing you add in, because it's the easiest thing. (John Oliver (comedian))
Politics has become infused with narcissism in America. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I wanted to be a soccer player. I knew that couldn't happen. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I do one accent - my own. I can make it louder or quieter. That is the sum total of my vocal range. I thought I could do an American accent until I tried it in front of an American - the expression of horror is still burnt onto my retinas. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
My family are from Liverpool, so I have some twang there - I have a Midlands accent, and I was raised about an hour north of London, so my voice is a mess. Although, to American ears, it sounds like the crisp language of a queen's butler. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I knew I was going to go into the field and make fun of people to their faces. I knew what I was getting into. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
The disconnect between America and its military is shocking. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
You just try to be true to your idea of what is funny and what is also interesting. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I think Americans still can't help but respond to the natural authority of this voice. Deep down they long to be told what to do by a British accent. That's why so many infomercials have British people. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
The British media is sinking down, as the American news media has lowered the bar for all of humanity. British news media is definitely trying to stoop down to that level. Everyone is stooping to the lowest common denominator. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
When you're doing stand-up, you want to stand onstage and, to the extent that you can, uncomplicatedly entertain. (John Oliver (comedian))
Politicians don't really bring up religion in England. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
In improv, the whole thing is that it is a relationship between the two people, as a back and forth. In standup, you don't really want to be listening to what somebody is saying; you want to project your jokes into their face. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
Every empire has to get sucked down the drain. As a British person, I know how it feels. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
There is an inherent hope and positive drive to New Yorkers. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I feel more at home knowing I'm not really at home. It takes all the pressure off you trying to fit in! View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
We invented words; we'll tell you how they're supposed to sound. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
A Southern accent is not a club in my bag. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
People are friendlier in New York than London. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
Armando Iannucci is one of my heroes. As I was growing up, he was probably the most influential comic voice that I had. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I would hate to meet myself at 15. (John Oliver (comedian))
I would much rather America was a more stable, wonderful place. You know, I love it. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I really love stand-up. I'm more than happy to do it for nothing. I've come to America to do it for nothing. It's the American Dream: Work for free. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
I find it hard in my general life to think further than the week ahead. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)
The moment I accept that there's an artistic, redeeming quality in puns, I have a horrible feeling I'll get hooked. View quote
John Oliver (comedian)