Kathy Griffin quotes - page 5

(About gay cruising) My gays had to school me, and they said there's a whole system and a language to the tapping. One tap means you're a top, two means you're a bottom..... I don't know, it's very elaborate. Very elaborate. (Kathy Griffin)
We didn't know that the (Jackson) family was as nuts as we're now finding out. Who knew that Michael was the normal one??
Kathy Griffin
(About Joe Jackson) First of all, he's sitting there with the pimp hat, and the tattooed drag queen eyebrows. Like maybe this whole time, he just has a separate drag character that he does at night.........named La Toya!
Kathy Griffin
A lot of celebrities, especially when you're talking about the really big ones, live in what I call the fame bubble. Nobody ever says no to them or challenges them or even teases them.
Kathy Griffin
I'm basically always on tour.
Kathy Griffin
I have a no-apology policy.
Kathy Griffin
I'll be honest, there's a part of me that does think I'm held to a different standard than my contemporaries and peers, and it's a little frustrating.
Kathy Griffin
Remember, folks, I am a comedian, not a journalist.
Kathy Griffin
I constantly say things that I regret. I mortify myself constantly.
Kathy Griffin
I have to tell you, though, the sexism in late night talk is so profound.
Kathy Griffin
I have what I call A-list moments, but believe me, I'm still on the D-list. (Kathy Griffin)
I grew up in Chicago and was a huge fan of 'The Second City', so when I moved to L.A., I was looking for anything that resembled that... then I started 'The Groundlings', so I went to a show and it was very much like 'Second City'. I was so impressed that that same night I went backstage and I went up to the funniest person there.
Kathy Griffin
(Recalling her conversation with Anna Nicole Smith eating lunch) All of a sudden, she takes a bite of something and she goes like this (makes a disgusted face) "I don't lahk it." I go, "What's the matter, honey?" and she goes "I don't lahk it. I thought it was mashed pataters." PA-TAY-TERS! I heard it with my own ears. PATATERS. Britney probably wants to marry her now. So, anyway, I looked on her plate and said, "No, it's polenta" and, I swear to God, she looks at me and goes "Pimento?" I said, "No, that's an olive. "Polenta"
Kathy Griffin
To give up my job as a temp and actually make a living doing comedy, it was staggering.
Kathy Griffin
I am an outsider looking in, absolutely. You're not going to see me at the Academy Awards 'Vanity Fair' party any time soon. I'm not somebody who, no matter where I go, there are paparazzi or any of that nonsense. But I have a little window into that world, and I can enter it and dance around. I want to be the audience's ticket into the party.
Kathy Griffin
I identify with the regular person, because that is who I am.
Kathy Griffin
I have a no-apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I'm on stage, I'm at a microphone... it's a joke!
Kathy Griffin
I love to work. I love doing standup.
Kathy Griffin
I'm not an artist. I tell inappropriate stories and jokes and I try to make people laugh.
Kathy Griffin
Have I gone too far?
Kathy Griffin
Oh, I constantly say things that I regret. I mortify myself constantly. But that's just part of the deal. I'm not really sure what's going to come out of my mouth. (Kathy Griffin)
Well, Jon Hamm isn't a real celebrity.
Kathy Griffin
I prefer being known for my stand-up because I write it. I love being an actor, and saying other people's words is great. But then, when I do stand-up, I love getting my own point of view out there.
Kathy Griffin
Pretty much everywhere I go, I'm pretty much thinking I'm going to be bounced. I am still the outsider who snuck into the party. I identify with the regular person, because that is who I am.
Kathy Griffin
Phoenix is great. I love Phoenix, ... I love Scottsdale. I love the James Hotel. I have a Kathy Griffin suite. I love -what's that place called AZ 88. I had never had a cheese crisp, so I went to - oh, can't remember. We went to the State Fair, where I was all about the deep-fried Twinkie. I ate every deep-fried thing - oh, it was heavenly. I ate until I got sick.
Kathy Griffin