Kathy Griffin quotes - page 4

I can say whatever I want. So do not bring the kids. It's definitely rated R. (Kathy Griffin)

I think a Celebrity Survivor would be great.

Kathy Griffin

Food is my thing, I do not smoke or drink, so food is my vice.

Kathy Griffin

I also love Mole, the unsung hero of reality programming.

Kathy Griffin

That's life when you're on the D-list.

Kathy Griffin

I'm not always in that good with middle-aged heterosexual men.

Kathy Griffin

The thing that cracks me up is how these reality characters start out thrilled and excited just to be on television, and how they move to thinking they are as big as the Friends.

Kathy Griffin

The beauty about the D-list is that people who are on it probably don't know they are.

Kathy Griffin

I do road gigs occasionally but I don't want to go out on the road for months at a time.

Kathy Griffin

I have friends who are going through chemotherapy, and they make the darkest, most hideous cancer jokes you've ever heard.

Kathy Griffin

I hate it, it is tedious... when I write for my act, it is very improvisational, I write bullet points, I cannot sit in front of a computer; that is not my style. (Kathy Griffin)

I'm also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It's going to be a spoof of Biography.

Kathy Griffin

That's what I loved about Temptation Island. I don't even know why they did it.

Kathy Griffin

The thing that bums me out about 'The Real World' is I don't want to believe that teenagers are that stupid.

Kathy Griffin

It was a nightmare having cameras in the house 10 hours a day for a month.

Kathy Griffin

I'm on every worst-dressed list imaginable.

Kathy Griffin

My act has always reflected what's going on in my life.

Kathy Griffin

I'm always listening and watching; my ear is like a boom mike. And judging, frankly. Constantly judging.

Kathy Griffin

A lot of stars don't have a sense of humor.

Kathy Griffin

I actually have to pick and chose stuff that I know I'm going to bomb at.

Kathy Griffin

I had a run in with Whitney Houston, or as I call her, "Cracky." (Kathy Griffin)

Apparently, Courtney Love was at Whitney's "intervention". And when Courtney Love is telling you, you're hittin the pipe too hard, well, things are bad! They're really bad!

Kathy Griffin

I knew the minute I heard the "gay inhale". He literally goes "Diva, what are you doing here?". It was heaven! I found my gay, even in Kandahar, Afghanistan! He plonks down next to me, puts the tray down, puts his gun down... he's like "Errghh, girl, I'm on graveyard tonight... I am a wreck... I'm exhausted... my roommates are all snoring, yee-ukk, they're pigs! Anyway, what's going on with Ben and J-Lo?"

Kathy Griffin

I can't stand that asshole Ryan Seacrest and here's why. He can't sing. He can't dance. He has no talent. When is he gonna go away?

Kathy Griffin

Cause you know my joke is that I love her (Oprah Winfrey) but she thinks she's Jesus? And when she gets a paper cut she's like "Oh, stigmata?". No, Oprah. Get off the cross and do your show!

Kathy Griffin

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