Zach Galifianakis quotes - page 2

That was some really great "fatcting." (Zach Galifianakis)

I wear a lot of Axe body spray, but I live in a black neighborhood. Over there, they call it Ask body spray. If you don't get that joke, then you're not racist.

Zach Galifianakis

I like to stump Google. The other day I Google'd "how many Mexicans live in North Korea".... Google didn't know. I also Google'd "how many candles does Dave Navarro own?"...14,000.

Zach Galifianakis

Sometimes I order a beet salad, so when the waiter comes and lays down my salad I can say "thanks for laying down those funky beets". It's an expensive joke because I don't even like beets.

Zach Galifianakis

I get burned out on standup. But I like acting. I do like it. But sometimes you just feel like a monkey. You just feel like a complete tool. But I like it. I do like it. Stand-up is just more free. A lot more freedom because you just do what you want to do.

Zach Galifianakis

People get TV deals by doing something in their grandmother's basement. It is definitely the wave. Everybody is trying to do all that stuff. I mean, the Internet is the only reason that I've gotten work is because I've somehow created a line and people have seen it. And then I've been asked to auditions.

Zach Galifianakis

I wish I could sit back and say, 'Oh, I'm gonna wait for a Merchant-Ivory film to come my way. Or Ivory-Merchant. Whatever it's called. But you just take what's given and then, hopefully, down the road you can be more choosy and only do, say, Wayans brothers movies. That's my goal: to be more Merchant-Ivory-Wayans.

Zach Galifianakis

When I was in high school I used to sit by myself in the cafeteria - not necessarily by choice - but I thought it was funny to talk to people that weren't there.

Zach Galifianakis

My real last name is Galifianakisburg.

Zach Galifianakis

I am going to be the next Ryan Gosling.

Zach Galifianakis

When a role seems fun it's easy to play. It kind of comes organically. (Zach Galifianakis)

I just try to keep myself a traditionalist. I liked being an underground comic doing my thing. I want to maintain that. I just do.

Zach Galifianakis

I'm Greek. My body produces feta cheese.

Zach Galifianakis

I'm not versed enough in constitutional law to run for office. I'd have to go back to school or something.

Zach Galifianakis

My forte is awkwardness.

Zach Galifianakis

I think comedy does have that powerful thing that doesn't seem too preachy because you're also making people laugh, so it's really kind of a good tool for messaging.

Zach Galifianakis

I haven't been hit since Leon Spinks hit me in '92.

Zach Galifianakis

I try to write three jokes every day. I don't sit down and write them, it's just things that pop into my head. Then I'll go watch it fail onstage that night.

Zach Galifianakis

There's more to life than being an actor in a Hollywood movie. I'm not going to adapt my life after that existence, where a lot of people do. And they get the publicist, and they get all that stuff, and it becomes them. I think it's a stupid way to live your life. A really dumb way to live your life.

Zach Galifianakis

I've been happily dedicated to the same woman for a number of years. I never even look at other women.

Zach Galifianakis

I don't like cursing in movies. I feel like cursing has become the new hackiness. You try to find substitutions for cursing. (Zach Galifianakis)

As a comic, it's anti-comedy to be known. I think a lot of comedic actors get lost in this world of Hollywood and all this stuff. They lose what brought them there in the first place. I'm very trepidatious about it.

Zach Galifianakis

Privacy is big for me. To do interviews even, I have a very love/hate with it.

Zach Galifianakis

American society loves to prop people up and then take them down.

Zach Galifianakis

I kind of put myself out there as is. I'm a quiet person. I don't know if that's surprising. I'm a Pilates junkie.

Zach Galifianakis

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