Jimmy Carr quotes - page 2

You never want to be the grumpy guy, although I do have quite a grumpy face. (Jimmy Carr)
There's things that I couldn't joke about but other people could. View quote
Jimmy Carr
Women were quite terrifying until I was older. I think that's partly down to confidence. View quote
Jimmy Carr
More people are going out to comedy shows than they were before. View quote
Jimmy Carr
The tragedy for comedians is there's nothing more they want than to be liked. We desperately seek approval. It's almost like a personality disorder you can do as a job. View quote
Jimmy Carr
You go, well you can't joke about race. Well if you're from a different race and that's your experience of the world and you want to talk about that, then fine. Or you can't talk about disability, but disabled comics can talk about that. View quote
Jimmy Carr
Like most of the world's population I'm into coffee, but in a properly big and important way. My perfect weekend would start with a pint of coffee. View quote
Jimmy Carr
It is such a social thing, laughing. Two thousand people in a room laughing is such a great buzz and they tend to laugh much more in a group. View quote
Jimmy Carr
The bigger the audience, the better with comedy. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I am trying to release endorphins here. I am not preaching to you - I am trying to make you laugh. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I don't see myself as offending people. (Jimmy Carr)
A surprising amount of my jokes sound very implausible but are true. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I think the idea that death is not the end, that your dog's just gone to live on the farm, is limiting. Thoughts like that prevent you from making the most of the time that you have. View quote
Jimmy Carr
It's so clear cut with a comedian - you have that reflex action, whereby you laugh or you don't. And so you either love us or you simply cannot see why people are laughing. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I don't think it's any coincidence that I lost my religious faith and 'manned up' in the same year. I was described somewhere as a lapsed Catholic, which is funny because I'm not going back! I want to achieve things rather than live life in an animalistic way. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I didn't plan to be the rude middle-class comedian. You write a certain type of joke that you find funny, and mine happen to be often rude. Yes, it's juvenile, but that's me. View quote
Jimmy Carr
If I'm at home for the weekend - and that is almost never - I tend to get twitchy at about eight o'clock in the evening because my body clock is timed to go on stage. I don't know what to do with myself. View quote
Jimmy Carr
Staying in luxury hotels still gives me a kick, especially Oulton Hall in Yorkshire. I'd stay in a hotel for the breakfast and room service. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I go around the country and do a simple gag like, 'The property ladder is now a snake' and get a real laugh. View quote
Jimmy Carr
After a gig I always head back to the hotel, remembering granny's words of wisdom. I cancel the late-night pizza and watch the Jonathan Ross show instead. View quote
Jimmy Carr
I'm obsessed with TV. How wrong our parents were when they said we should only watch an hour a day. Stop wasting your time reading books. (Jimmy Carr)
I like to write a joke without any fat on it.The shorter the better. I cater for people with ADD, basically. View quote
Jimmy Carr
Even if you're doing the national insurance awards, there's still that excitement when you wonder who is going to win, er, best premiums. View quote
Jimmy Carr