Joe Bob Briggs quotes

Apparently we love our own cell phones but we hate everyone else's. (Joe Bob Briggs)
It's not a crime to get drunk. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Faith is like a kernel of wheat. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
There is no post-9/11. Everything from now until the end of time is post-9/11. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Speaking of things that'll make your head explode, "Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story" finally made it to the drive-in. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
The fifties were when people started coming down on "juvenile delinquents," "hoodlums," "vandals"--anybody that was young, wore a motorcycle jacket, and didn't act polite around older people. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
I made the mistake of watching "A. I." on cable the week they showed it about 792 times, and I ended up watching it every time it was on. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
If you hate what you're seeing, you call it sex and violence. If you like it, you call it 'romance and adventure.' View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
I AM a male chauvinist. Who's been saying otherwise? View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Discourse is fleeting, but junk mail is forever. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Everything changed in Bosnia, when General Wesley Clark proved that you could fight a war with high- level precision air strikes and a bare minimum of ground action. (Joe Bob Briggs)
The Italians always made good wine, but you had the impression they were friendly guys in straw hats running family vineyards with slaves or something so that the vino was never more than ten bucks a bottle. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
A universal draft is most often the instrument of Third World dictators. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
The best ally you can have in breaking up a street fight is a grandmother. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
If you know what I mean, and I think you do. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
The man is ugly, the man is evil, and the man is in love. This is gonna be an American classic. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Menahem Golan, the Israeli king of the ninja flick, announced he was producing the remake. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Joe Bob says check it out. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Eleven dead bodies. One dead cat. No breasts. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
I think we should take money from everyone," I told her, "regardless of their ability to pay. After all, this is America. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
As I've said many times, the single most oppressed class in America right now is the teenager. (Joe Bob Briggs)
In some European theaters, it's still not uncommon to have a late start and three LONG intermissions, because people actually eat and drink and converse during the intermissions. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs
Almost every venerable tradition at a men's club starts out as a joke. View quote
Joe Bob Briggs