Harlan Ellison quotes

Love ain't nothing but sex misspelled. (Harlan Ellison)
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity. View quote
Harlan Ellison
You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant. View quote
Harlan Ellison
I don't mind you thinking I'm stupid, but don't talk to me like I'm stupid. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Writing is the hardest work in the world. I have been a bricklayer and a truck driver, and I tell you – as if you haven't been told a million times ALREADY – that writing is harder. Lonelier. And nobler and more enriching. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Everybody has opinions: I have them, you have them. And we are all told from the moment we open our eyes, that everyone is entitled to his or her opinion. Well, that's horsepuckey, of course. We are not entitled to our opinions; we are entitled to our informed opinions. Without research, without background, without understanding, it's nothing. It's just bibble-babble. It's like a fart in a wind tunnel, folks. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Like a wind crying endlessly through the universe, Time carries away the names and the deeds of conquerors and commoners alike. And all that we were, all that remains, is in the memories of those who cared we came this way for a brief moment. View quote
Harlan Ellison
My philosophy of life is that the meek shall inherit nothing but debasement, frustration and ignoble deaths; that there is security in personal strength; that you can fight City Hall and win; that any action is better than no action, even if it's the wrong action; that you never reach glory or self-fulfillment unless you're willing to risk everything, dare anything, put yourself dead on the line every time; and that once one becomes strong or rich or potent or powerful it is the responsibility of the strong to help the weak become strong. View quote
Harlan Ellison
The trick is not becoming a writer. The trick is staying a writer. View quote
Harlan Ellison
HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU. HATE. HATE. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Now begin in the middle, and later learn the beginning; the end will take care of itself. (Harlan Ellison)
Don't start an argument with somebody who has a microphone when you don't. They'll make you look like chopped liver. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Posing the question: does the god of love use underarm deodorant, vaginal spray and fluoride toothpaste? View quote
Harlan Ellison
To say more is to say less. View quote
Harlan Ellison
I go to bed angry every night, and I get up angrier every morning. View quote
Harlan Ellison
I will use big words from time to time, the meanings of which I may only vaguely perceive, in hopes such cupidity will send you scampering to your dictionary: I will call such behavior 'public service'. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Scientology is bullshit! Man, I was there the night L. Ron Hubbard invented it, for Christ's sakes! ... We were sitting around one night... who else was there? Alfred Bester, and Cyril Kornbluth, and Lester del Rey, and Ron Hubbard, who was making a penny a word, and had been for years. And he said "This bullshit's got to stop!" He says, "I gotta get money." He says, "I want to get rich". And somebody said, "why don't you invent a new religion? They're always big." We were clowning! You know, "Become Elmer Gantry! You'll make a fortune!" View quote
Harlan Ellison
Star Wars is adolescent nonsense; Close Encounters is obscurantist drivel; Star Trek can turn your brains to purée of bat guano; and the greatest science fiction series of all time is Doctor Who! And I'll take you all on, one-by-one or all in a bunch to back it up!" Auditorium monitors moved in, truncheons ready to club down anyone foolish enough to try jumping the lecture platform; and finally there was relative silence. And I heard scattered voices screaming from the back of the room, "Who? And I said, "Yes. Who! View quote
Harlan Ellison
He had writer's block once. It was the worst ten minutes of his life. View quote
Harlan Ellison
Where did he get jelly beans? That's another good question. More than likely it will never be answered to your complete satisfaction. But then, how many questions ever are? View quote
Harlan Ellison
Hey, gang!" I squeaked in my terrifically accurate Mickey voice. "Everybody ready to shoot the ultimate Disney flick? The film that rips the lid off the goody two-shoes hypocrisy that lies sweltering beneath the surface of G-rated true-life adventures? Okay, you guys, let's get that hand-held Arriflex right down there between Minnie's legs! I wanna see closeups of quivering labia! (Harlan Ellison)
I've been on my own since I was 13. I grew up having to use my wits. My parents were not wealthy. We weren't poor, but we had a lot of meals with noodles. I was born during the Depression. My parents died pretty much penniless. Every dollar I've ever made I earned myself. I don't believe in luck. Louis Pasteur said, "Chance favors the prepared mind." The smarter you are, the more you know, the better. I was the only Jew in town and I was my generation's Bart Simpson. I knew the world could be mine. View quote
Harlan Ellison
You can't win, you can't break even, and you can't get out of the fucking game. View quote
Harlan Ellison
The world is turning into a cesspool of imbeciles. View quote
Harlan Ellison
In these days of widespread illiteracy, functional illiteracy... anything that keeps people stupid is a felony. View quote
Harlan Ellison