Terry Pratchett quotes - page 5

If you kept changing the way people saw the world, you ended up changing the way you saw yourself. (Terry Pratchett)
People needed to believe in gods, if only because it was so hard to believe in people. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Last night there seemed to be a chance. Anything was possible last night. That was the trouble with last nights. They were always followed by this mornings. View quote
Terry Pratchett
On the Disc the gods dealt severely with atheists. View quote
Terry Pratchett
When Mister Safety Catch Is Not On, Mister Crossbow Is Not Your Friend. View quote
Terry Pratchett
But the purpose of the book is not the horror, it is horror's defeat. View quote
Terry Pratchett
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Suicide was against the law. Johnny had wondered why. It meant that if you missed, or the gas ran out, or the rope broke, you could get locked up in prison to show you that life was really very jolly and thoroughly worth living. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Perhaps, if you knew you were going to die, your senses crammed in as much detail as they could while they still had the chance... View quote
Terry Pratchett
I wish that the people who sing about the deeds of heroes would think about the people who have to clear up after them. View quote
Terry Pratchett
I think that sick people in Ankh-Morpork generally go to a vet. It's generally a better bet. There's more pressure on a vet to get it right. People say "it was god's will" when granny dies, but they get angry when they lose a cow. (Terry Pratchett)
It's an interesting fact that fewer than 17 % of Real cats end their lives with the same name they started with. Much family effort goes into selecting one at the start ("She looks like a Winnifred to me"), and the as the years roll by it suddenly finds itself being called Meepo or Ratbag. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Consider the situation. There you are, forehead like a set of balconies, worrying about the long-term effects of all this new 'fire' stuff on the environment, you're being chased and eaten by most of the planet's large animals, and suddenly tiny versions of one of the worst of them wanders into the cave and starts to purr. View quote
Terry Pratchett
I once absent-mindedly ordered Three Mile Island dressing in a restaurant and, with great presence of mind, they brought Thousand Island Dressing and a bottle of chili sauce. View quote
Terry Pratchett
As they say in Discworld, we are trying to unravel the Mighty Infinite using a language which was designed to tell one another where the fresh fruit was. View quote
Terry Pratchett
My programming language was solder. View quote
Terry Pratchett
A true beanie should have a propellor on the top. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Wikipedia, eh? Must be accurate then! View quote
Terry Pratchett
I must confess the activities of the UK governments for the past couple of years have been watched with frank admiration and amazement by Lord Vetinari. Outright theft as a policy had never occurred to him. View quote
Terry Pratchett
It's amazing how fast gold works. View quote
Terry Pratchett
The space between the young readers eyeballs and the printed page is a holy place and officialdom should trample all over it at their peril. (Terry Pratchett)
No, I happen to be one of those people whose memory shuts down under pressure. The answers would come to me in the middle of the night in my sleep! Besides, I am a millionaire. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Out of Print" is bookseller speak for "We can't be hedgehogged. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Cats don't hunt seals. They would if they knew what they were and where to find them. But they don't, so that's all right. View quote
Terry Pratchett