Terry Pratchett quotes - page 3

They can ta'k our lives but they can never ta'k our freedom!' Now there's a battle cry not designed by a clear thinker... (Terry Pratchett)
Anyway, just because you're sworn enemies doesn't mean you can't be friends, does it? View quote
Terry Pratchett
I'm referred to, I see, as 'the biggest banker in modern publishing'. Now there's a line that needed the celebrated Guardian proof-reading. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Our garden was debated territory between five local cats, and we'd heard that the best way to keep other cats out of the garden was to have one yourself. A moment's rational thought here will spot the slight flaw in this reasoning. View quote
Terry Pratchett
When they're standing right in front of you, kings are a kind of speech impediment. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Oh, come on. Revelation was a mushroom dream that belonged in the Apocrypha. The New Testament is basically about what happened when God got religion. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often students, for heaven's sake. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Everyone's heard of Erwin Schrodinger's famous thought experiment. You put a cat in a box with a bottle of poison, which many people would suggest is about as far as you need to go. View quote
Terry Pratchett
[The pamphlet] was very patriotic. That is, it talked about killing foreigners. View quote
Terry Pratchett
If you put butter and salt on it, it tastes like salty butter. View quote
Terry Pratchett
No. Men should die for lies. But the truth is too precious to die for. (Terry Pratchett)
A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores. View quote
Terry Pratchett
The duke had a mind that ticked like a clock and, like a clock, it regularly went cuckoo. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Always be wary of any helpful item that weighs less than its operating manual. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Sometimes glass glitters more than diamonds because it has more to prove. View quote
Terry Pratchett
The consensus seemed to be that if really large numbers of men were sent to storm the mountain, then enough might survive the rocks to take the citadel. This is essentially the basis of all military thinking. View quote
Terry Pratchett
A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read. View quote
Terry Pratchett
There is a rumour going around that I have found God. I think this is unlikely because I have enough difficulty finding my keys, and there is empirical evidence that they exist. View quote
Terry Pratchett
There are hardly any excesses of the most crazed psychopath that cannot easily be duplicated by a normal kindly family man who just comes in to work every day and has a job to do. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Everything makes sense a bit at a time. But when you try to think of it all at once, it comes out wrong. View quote
Terry Pratchett
This book had two authors, and they were both the same person. (Terry Pratchett)
Stories of imagination tend to upset those without one. View quote
Terry Pratchett
She was beautiful, but she was beautiful in the way a forest fire was beautiful: something to be admired from a distance, not up close. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Seeing, contrary to popular wisdom, isn't believing. It's where belief stops, because it isn't needed any more. View quote
Terry Pratchett
Getting an education was a bit like a communicable sexual disease. It made you unsuitable for a lot of jobs and then you had the urge to pass it on. View quote
Terry Pratchett