Ambrose Bierce quotes - page 6

Painting, n.: The art of protecting flat surfaces from the weather, and exposing them to the critic. (Ambrose Bierce)
The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Acquaintance: "A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to. A degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor or obscure, and intimate when he is rich or famous. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Strive not for singularity in dress; Fools have the more and men of sense the less. To look original is not worth while, But be in mind a little out of style. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
DISOBEDIENCE, n. The silver lining to the cloud of servitude. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
TRUTHFUL, adj. Dumb and illiterate. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
There's no free will," says the philosopher; "To hang is most unjust." "There is no free will," assents the officer; "We hang because we must. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
AUSTRALIA, n. A country lying in the South Sea, whose industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or an island. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi. (Ambrose Bierce)
Twice – Once too often. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
CHRISTIAN, n. One who follows the teachings of Christ in so far as they are not inconsistent with a life of sin. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
The most intolerant advocate is he who is trying to convince himself. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Empty wine bottles have a bad opinion of women. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
While you have a future do not live too much in contemplation of your past: unless you are content to walk backward the mirror is a poor guide. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Wisdom is known only by contrasting it with folly; by shadow only we perceive that all visible objects are not flat. Yet Philanthropos would abolish evil! View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Convictions are variable; to be always consistent is to be sometimes dishonest. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
The palmist looks at the wrinkles made by closing the hand and says they signify character. The philosopher reads character by what the hand most loves to close upon. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Slang is the speech of him who robs the literary garbage carts on their way to the dumps. (Ambrose Bierce)
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
To be comic is merely to be playful, but wit is a serious matter. To laugh at it is to confess that you do not understand. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
The money-getter who pleads his love of work has a lame defense, for love of work at money-getting is a lower taste than love of money. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
Riven and torn with cannon-shot, the trunks of the trees protruded bunches of splinters like hands, the fingers above the wound interlacing with those below. View quote
Ambrose Bierce