Ambrose Bierce quotes - page 22

RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the affairs of to-day. (Ambrose Bierce)
ART, n. This word has no definition. Its origin is related by the ingenious Father Gassalasca Jape as 'One day a wag what would the wretch be at Shifted a letter of the cipher RAT, And said it was a god's name ...' View quote
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REVIEW, v.t. To set your wisdom (holding not a doubt of it. Although in truth there's neither bone nor skin to it) At work upon a book, and so read out of it The qualities that you have first read into it. View quote
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OUTCOME, n. A particular type of disappointment .... judged by the outcome, the result. This is immortal nonsense the wisdom of an act is to be juded by the light that the doer had when he performed it. View quote
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CENTAUR, n. One of a race of persons who lived before the division of labor had been carried to such a pitch of differentiation, and who followed the primitive economic maxim, 'Every man his own horse.' View quote
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EXPOSTULATION, n. One of the many methods by which fools prefer to lose their friends. View quote
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BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends. View quote
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RACK, n. An argumentative implement formerly much used in persuading devotees of a false faith to embrace the living truth. As a call to the unconverted the rack never had any particular efficacy, and is now held in light popular esteem. View quote
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PARDON, v. To remit a penalty and restore to the life of crime. To add to the lure of crime the temptation of ingratitude. View quote
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OPERA, n. A play representing life in another world, whose inhabitants have no speech but song, no motions but gestures and no postures but attitudes. View quote
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NOBLEMAN, n. Nature's provision for wealthy American minds ambitious to incur social distinction and suffer high life. (Ambrose Bierce)
INCOMPATIBILITY, n. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination. Incompatibility may, however, consist of a meek-eyed matron living just around the corner. It has even been known to wear a moustache. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
POCKET, n. The cradle of motive and the grave of conscience. In woman this organ is lacking so she acts without motive, and her conscience, denied burial, remains ever alive, confessing the sins of others. View quote
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ACCUSE, v.t. To affirm another's guilt or unworth most commonly as a justification of ourselves for having wronged him. View quote
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INDISCRETION, n. The guilt of woman. View quote
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INJUSTICE, n. A burden which of all those that we load upon others and carry ourselves is lightest in the hands and heaviest upon the back. View quote
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RIMER, n. A poet regarded with indifference or disesteem. View quote
Ambrose Bierce
PLATITUDE, n. The fundamental element and special glory of popular literature. A thought that snores in words that smoke. All that is mortal of a departed truth. A jelly-fish withering on the shore of the sea of thought. A desiccated epigram. View quote
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CALUMNUS, n. A graduate of the School for Scandal. View quote
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MUGWUMP, n. In politics one afflicted with self-respect and addicted to the vice of independence. A term of contempt. View quote
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IMBECILITY, n. A kind of divine inspiration, or sacred fire affecting censorious critics of this dictionary. (Ambrose Bierce)
UNITARIAN, n. One who denies the divinity of a Trinitarian. View quote
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GLUTTON, n. A person who escapes the evils of moderation by committing dyspepsia. View quote
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SORCERY, n. The ancient prototype and forerunner of political influence. It was, however, deemed less respectable and sometimes was punished by torture and death. View quote
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MERCY, n. An attribute beloved of detected offenders. View quote
Ambrose Bierce