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Josh Billings quotes - page 8
Music hath the charm to soothe a savage beast, but I'd try a revolver first.
Josh Billings
The miser and the glutton are two facetious buzzards one hides his store, and the other stores his hide.
Josh Billings
It is the little bits of things that fret and worry us we can dodge a elephant, but we can't dodge a fly.
Josh Billings
Always live within your income, even if you have to borrow money to do so.
Josh Billings
I hate to be a kicker, I always long for peace, but the wheel that does the squeaking is the one that gets the grease.
Josh Billings
Don't put off till tomorrow what can be enjoyed today.
Josh Billings
I hold that a man has as much right to spell a word as it is pronounced as he has to pronounce it the way it ain't spelled.
Josh Billings
The very thing that men think they have got the most of, they have got the least of and that is judgment.
Josh Billings
Newfoundland dogs are good to save children from drowning, but you must have a pond of water handy and a child, or else there will be no profit in boarding a Newfoundland.
Josh Billings
My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other.
Josh Billings
Keep a cow, and the milk won't have to be watered but once.
Josh Billings
He whom prosperity humbles, and adversity strengthens, is the true hero.
Josh Billings
It ain't so much trouble to get rich as it is to tell when we have got rich.
Josh Billings
Never teach your child to be cunning for you may be certain that you will be one of the first victims of his shrewdness.
Josh Billings
If animals had reason, they would act just as ridiculous as we menfolks do.
Josh Billings
I am a poor man, but I have this consolation I am poor by accident, not by design.
Josh Billings
Never run into debt, not if you can find anything else to run into.
Josh Billings
There is gravity in wisdom, but no particular wisdom in gravity.
Josh Billings
The truly innocent are those who not only are guiltless themselves, but who think others are.
Josh Billings
Solitude A good place to visit, but a poor place to stay.
Josh Billings
The trouble with most folks ain't so much their ignorance as knowing so many things that ain't so.
Josh Billings
There is a sort of charm in ugliness, if the person has some redeeming qualities and is only ugly enough.
Josh Billings
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