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Woody Allen quotes - page 8
My films are therapy for my debilitating depression. In institutions people weave baskets. I make films.
Woody Allen
Life is short. Short, and not about anything except what you can touch and what touches you.
Woody Allen
You know what my philosophy of life is? That it's important to have some laughs, but you got to suffer a little too, because otherwise you miss the whole point to life.
Woody Allen
I read in self-defense.
Woody Allen
The heart is a very, very resilient little muscle. It really is.
Woody Allen
In my next life I want to live backwards. Start out dead and finish off as an orgasm.
Woody Allen
Just don't take any class where you have to read BEOWULF.
Woody Allen
I asked the girl if she could bring a sister for me. She did. Sister Maria Teresa. It was a very slow evening. We discussed the New Testament. We agreed that He was very well adjusted for an only child.
Woody Allen
Why not? Life is short, life is dull, life is full of pain - and this is a chance for something special.
Woody Allen
I wonder if Socrates and Plato took a house on Crete during the summer.
Woody Allen
While we're waiting for a cab I'll give you your lesson for today. Don't listen to what your teachers tell ya, you know. Don't pay attention. Just, just see what they look like and that's how you'll know what life is really gonna be like.
Woody Allen
How wrong Emily Dickinson was! Hope is not "the thing with feathers." The thing with feathers has turned out to be my nephew. I must take him to a specialist in Zurich.
Woody Allen
She wore a short skirt and a tight sweater and her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak.
Woody Allen
You'll find as you go through life that great depth and smoldering sensuality don't always win.
Woody Allen
Is Knowledge knowable? If not, how do we know?
Woody Allen
Doris: You have no values. With you it's all nihilism, cynicism, sarcasm, and orgasm.Harry: Hey, in France I could run for office with that slogan, and win!
Woody Allen
As we know, for centuries Rome regarded the Open Hot Turkey Sandwich as the height of licentiousness.
Woody Allen
I made the statement years ago which is often quoted that 80 percent of life is showing up. People used to always say to me that they wanted to write a play, they wanted to write a movie, they wanted to write a novel, and the couple of people that did it were 80 percent of the way to having something happen. All the other people struck out without ever getting that pack. They couldn't do it, that's why they don't accomplish a thing, they don't do the thing, so once you do it, if you actually write your film script, or write your novel, you are more than half way towards something good happening. So that I was say [sic] my biggest life lesson that has worked. All others have failed me.
Woody Allen
I was supremely confident my flair for atmosphere and characterization would sparkle alongside the numbing mulch ground out by studio hacks. Certainly the space atop my mantel might be better festooned by a gold statuette than by the plastic dipping bird that now bobbed there ad infinitum.
Woody Allen
Of all the famous men who ever lived, the one I would most like to have been was Socrates. Not just because he was a great thinker, because I have been known to have some reasonably profound insights myself, although mine invariably revolve around a Swedish airline stewardess and some handcuffs.
Woody Allen
With that, he scribbled in an additional ninety thousand dollars on the estimate, which had waxed to the girth of the Talmud while rivaling it in possible interpretations.
Woody Allen
I have also reviewed my own financial obligations, which have puffed up recently like a hammered thumb.
Woody Allen
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