P. G. Wodehouse quotes - page 2

There are moments, Jeeves, when one asks oneself, "Do trousers matter?"' ‘The mood will pass, sir. (P. G. Wodehouse)
You're one of those guys who can make a party just by leaving it. It's a great gift. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Work, the what's-its-name of the thingummy and the thing-um-a-bob of the what d'you-call-it. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
He groaned slightly and winced, like Prometheus watching his vulture dropping in for lunch. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Nature, when planning this sterling fellow, shoved in a lot more lower jaw than was absolutely necessary and made the eyes a bit too keen and piercing for one who was neither an Empire builder nor a traffic policeman. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
I pressed down the mental accelerator. The old lemon throbbed fiercely. I got an idea. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
It was one of the dullest speeches I ever heard. The Agee woman told us for three quarters of an hour how she came to write her beastly book, when a simple apology was all that was required. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
It has been well said that an author who expects results from a first novel is in a position similar to that of a man who drops a rose petal down the Grand Canyon of Arizona and listens for the echo. (P. G. Wodehouse)
When you have just been told that the girl you love is definitely betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel when the bomb goes off too soon. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
It isn't often that Aunt Dahlia, lets her angry passions rise, but when she does, strong men climb trees and pull them up after them. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
However devoutly a girl may worship the man of her choice, there always comes a time when she feels an irresistible urge to haul off and let him have it in the neck. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Love has had a lot of press-agenting from the oldest times; but there are higher, nobler things than love. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Mere abuse is no criticism. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
I started violently, as if some unseen hand had goosed me. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Many a man may look respectable, and yet be able to hide at will behind a spiral staircase. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
It was a confusion of ideas between him and one of the lions he was hunting in Kenya that had caused A. B. Spottsworth to make the obituary column. He thought the lion was dead, and the lion thought it wasn't. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
A slight throbbing about the temples told me that this discussion had reached saturation point. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
And, anyway, no matter how much you may behave like the deaf adder of Scripture which, as you are doubtless aware, the more one piped, the less it danced, or words to that effect, I shall carry on as planned. (P. G. Wodehouse)
It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Beginning with a critique of my own limbs, which she said, justly enough, were nothing to write home about, this girl went on to dissect my manners, morals, intellect, general physique, and method of eating asparagus with such acerbity that by the time she had finished the best you could say of Bertram was that, so far as was known, he had never actually committed murder or set fire to an orphan asylum. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
His eyes were rolling in their sockets, and his face had taken on the colour and expression of a devout tomato. I could see he loved like a thousand bricks. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse
Dark hair fell in a sweep over his forehead. He looked like a man who would write vers libre, as indeed he did. View quote
P. G. Wodehouse