Ogden Nash quotes - page 2

There is only one way to achieve happiness on this terrestrial ball, and that is to have either a clear conscience or none at all. (Ogden Nash)
The bed is a bundle of paradoxes: we go to it with reluctance, yet we quit it with regret; we make up our minds every night to leave it early, but we make up our bodies every morning to keep it late. View quote
Ogden Nash
The most exciting happiness is the happiness generated by forces beyond your control. View quote
Ogden Nash
The song of canaries; Never varies, And when they're moulting; They're pretty revolting. View quote
Ogden Nash
Whether elected or appointed; He considers himself the Lord's annointed, And indeed the ointment lingers on him; So thick you can't get your fingers on him. View quote
Ogden Nash
How easy for those who do not bulge; To not overindulge. View quote
Ogden Nash
God in His wisdom made the fly; And then forgot to tell us why. View quote
Ogden Nash
Certainly there are lots of things in life that money wont buy, but its very funny Have you ever tried to buy them without money. View quote
Ogden Nash
Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for. View quote
Ogden Nash
Good wine needs no bush, And perhaps products that people really want need no hard-sell or soft-sell TV push. Why not; Look at pot. View quote
Ogden Nash
The further through life I drift; The more obvious it becomes that I am lacking in thrift. (Ogden Nash)
I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm. View quote
Ogden Nash
Man is a victim of dope; In the incurable form of hope. View quote
Ogden Nash
Indoors or out, no one relaxes; In March, that month of wind and taxes, The wind will presently disappear, The taxes last us all the year. View quote
Ogden Nash
I don't mind their having a lot of money, and I don't care how they employ it, But I do think that they damn well ought to admit they enjoy it. View quote
Ogden Nash
The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. View quote
Ogden Nash
So I think there is one rule every host and hostess ought to keep with the comb and nail file and bicarbonate and aromatic spirits on a handy shelf, Which is don't spoil the denouement by telling the guests everything is terrible, but let them have the thrill of finding it out for themselves. View quote
Ogden Nash
Life has a tendency to obfuscate and bewilder, Such as fating us to spend the first part of our lives being embarrassed by our parents and the last part being embarrassed by our childer. View quote
Ogden Nash
Time is timelessness for you; Calendars for the human; What's a year, or thirty, to Loveliness made woman? View quote
Ogden Nash
We love the kindly wind and hail, The jolly thunderbolt, We watch in glee the fairy trail Of ampere, watt, and volt. View quote
Ogden Nash
I believe that people believe what they believe they believe. (Ogden Nash)
It is my duty, gentlemen, to inform you that women are dictators all, and I recommend to you this moral: In real life it takes only one to make a quarrel. View quote
Ogden Nash
Passivity can be a provoking modus operandi; Consider the Empire and Gandhi. View quote
Ogden Nash
It is the sin of omission, the second kind of sin, That lays eggs under your skin. View quote
Ogden Nash
The moral is that it is probably better not to sin at all, but if some kind of sin you must be pursuing, Well, remember to do it by doing rather than by not doing. View quote
Ogden Nash