H. L. Mencken quotes - page 2

Morality is the theory that every human act must be either right or wrong, and that 99 % of them are wrong. (H. L. Mencken)
A gentlemen is one who never strikes a woman without provocation. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Judge: a law student who marks his own examination-papers. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Platitude: an idea (a) that is admitted to be true by everyone, and (b) that is not true. View quote
H. L. Mencken
All government, of course, is against liberty. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage. View quote
H. L. Mencken
The cynics are right nine times out of ten. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends. View quote
H. L. Mencken
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom. View quote
H. L. Mencken
The chief value of money lies in the fact that one lives in a world in which it is overestimated. (H. L. Mencken)
A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there. View quote
H. L. Mencken
To die for an idea; it is unquestionably noble. But how much nobler it would be if men died for ideas that were true! View quote
H. L. Mencken
The difference between a moral man and a man of honor is that the latter regrets a discreditable act, even when it has worked and he has not been caught. View quote
H. L. Mencken
The most costly of all follies is to believe passionately in the palpably not true. It is the chief occupation of mankind. View quote
H. L. Mencken
We are here and it is now. Further than that, all human knowledge is moonshine. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Self-respect: the secure feeling that no one, as yet, is suspicious. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Nevertheless, it is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man. View quote
H. L. Mencken
When women kiss it always reminds one of prize fighters shaking hands. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them. (H. L. Mencken)
The worst government is often the most moral. One composed of cynics is often very tolerant and humane. But when fanatics are on top there is no limit to oppression. View quote
H. L. Mencken
It is the dull man who is always sure, and the sure man who is always dull. View quote
H. L. Mencken
The worst of marriage is that it makes a woman believe that all men are just as easy to fool. View quote
H. L. Mencken
Before a man speaks it is always safe to assume that he is a fool. After he speaks, it is seldom necessary to assume it. View quote
H. L. Mencken