Kurt Vonnegut quotes - page 3

I do feel that evolution is being controlled by some sort of divine engineer. I can't help thinking that. And this engineer knows exactly what he or she is doing and why, and where evolution is headed. That's why we've got giraffes and hippopotami and the clap. (Kurt Vonnegut)
Roses are red, And ready for plucking, You're sixteen, And ready for high school. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
And I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
What is literature but an insider's newsletter about affairs relating to molecules, of no importance to anything in the Universe but a few molecules who have the disease called "thought." View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
What do men want? They want a lot of pals, and they wish that people wouldn't get so mad at them. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
I've got news for Mr. Santayana: we're doomed to repeat the past no matter what. That's what it is to be alive. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
You are pooped and demoralized. Why wouldn't you be? Of course it is exhausting, having to reason all the time in a universe which wasn't meant to be reasonable. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
The year was 2081, and everybody was finally equal. They weren't only equal before God and the law. They were equal every which way. Nobody was smarter than anybody else. Nobody was better looking than anybody else. Nobody was stronger or quicker than anybody else. All this equality was due to the 211th, 212th, and 213th Amendments to the Constitution, and to the unceasing vigilance of agents of the United States Handicapper General. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
I don't think there would be many jokes, if there weren't constant frustration and fear and so forth. It's a response to bad troubles like crime. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
We're terrible animals. I think that the Earth's immune system is trying to get rid of us, as well it should. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
You were sick, but now you're well, and there's work to do. (Kurt Vonnegut)
As far as I'm concerned ... the Universe is a junk yard, with everything overpriced. I am through poking around in the junk heaps, looking for bargains. Every so-called bargain ... has been connected by fine wires to a dynamite bouquet. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
If I should ever die, God forbid, I hope you will say, 'Kurt is up in heaven now.' That's my favorite joke. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Shrapnel was invented by an Englishman of the same name. Don't you wish you could have something named after you? View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Son--they say there isn't any royalty in this country, but do you want me to tell you how to be king of the United States of America? Just fall through the hole in a privy and come out smelling like a rose. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
How embarrassing it is to be human. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Listen: The waitress brought me another drink. She wanted to light my hurricane lamp again. I wouldn't let her. "Can you see anything in the dark, with your sunglasses on?" she asked me. "The big show is inside my head," I said. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
I urge you to please notice when you are happy. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
To whom it may concern: It is springtime. It is late afternoon. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Well, the telling of jokes is an art of its own, and it always rises from some emotional threat. The best jokes are dangerous, and dangerous because they are in some way truthful. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Any reviewer who expresses rage and loathing for a novel is preposterous. He or she is like a person who has put on full armor and attacked a hot fudge sundae. (Kurt Vonnegut)
Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
War is now a form of TV entertainment, and what made the First World War so particularly entertaining were two American inventions, barbed wire and the machine gun. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Time is liquid. One moment is no more important than any other and all moments quickly run away. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut
Symbols can be so beautiful, sometimes. View quote
Kurt Vonnegut