Stephen Colbert quotes - page 6

He believes the same thing Wednesday that he believed on Monday - no matter what happened Tuesday. (Stephen Colbert)
Of course, at the time, we thought we were being farcical. View quote
Stephen Colbert
So be real. That's the best thing you can do. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I have tender feelings for Nixon, because everybody has warm feelings about their childhood. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Before I get started, if anybody needs anything else at their tables, just speak slowly and clearly into your table numbers. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Language has always been important in politics, but language is incredibly important to the present political struggle. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Cynics always say no. But saying yes begins things. Saying yes is how things grow. Saying yes leads to knowledge. "Yes" is for young people. So for as long as you have the strength to, say yes. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Do you know what I like about comedy? You can't laugh and be afraid at the same time-of anything. If you're laughing, I defy you to be afraid. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Oliver Cromwell can kiss my singing emerald scrotum! View quote
Stephen Colbert
Don't let your girlfriend cut your hair! (Stephen Colbert)
Stephen: I spend so much time in the world that is spinning all the time, that to be in the no-spin zone actually gives me vertigo. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I deliver my Truth hot and hard. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I've been accused of being unambitious, but what I do takes up every minute. I'm executive producer, I'm a writer and the host. View quote
Stephen Colbert
If I had free time to go to Los Angeles to shoot a movie, I would rather spend it with my kids. View quote
Stephen Colbert
What the right-wing in the United States tries to do is undermine the press. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I'm a junkie for exhaustion, and I'm a junkie for setting up my expectations too high and then trying to meet them. View quote
Stephen Colbert
If you love friends, you will serve your friends. If you love community, you will serve your community. If you love money, you will serve your money. And if you love only yourself, you will serve only yourself. And you will have only yourself. View quote
Stephen Colbert
The interesting thing about grief, I think, is that it is its own size. It is not the size of you. It is its own size. And grief comes to you. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled in poetry. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that. I found it so inspirational. Why not make myself cooler than I am? (Stephen Colbert)
I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law. View quote
Stephen Colbert
I love being onstage. I love the relationship with the audience. I love the letting go, the sense of discovery, the improvising. View quote
Stephen Colbert
Status is always ripe for satire, status is always good for comedy. View quote
Stephen Colbert
My brother Billy was the joke teller. My brother Jim had a really sharp, cutting wit. And the teller of long stories, that was my brother Ed. As a child, I just absorbed everything they said, and I was always in competition for the laughs. View quote
Stephen Colbert